Dealing with the Loss

The pain of losing Ellie is getting a little better for both of us. We're both dealing with it differently, but it’s still harder on Travis.

The day we found out, I made cookies just to get my mind off of what had happened for a little while; we took the cookies with us to give to the vet and vet staff when we went to talk to him about what had happened. But since then, I seem to be taking a fairly direct approach to mourning. Today I went to see Ellie’s grave; Mom has it set up very nicely with flowers and a couple chairs. I've also begun thinking of a little memorial shadowbox for Ellie that will hold her collar tag and a photo.

Travis on the other hand is fighting his impulse to replace things when they’re broken. He’s already looking at puppies. Though he knows it’s too soon, he also thinks it would help him to stop focusing on the loss of Ellie. We’ll see what happens…

Burial

Daddy buried Ellie with her collar and her tennis ball this morning.

Ellie's Gone

Ellie Stats: Deceased, not yet 1 year and 6 months old

• The vet called Travis and told him that Ellie passed away last night at around 8 o’clock. He said that after surgery she continued to vomit, and nothing they gave her would stop it. We are devastated not only because we've lost Ellie, but also because there is still no apparent cause for her illness and eventual death. It is very frustrating and difficult to deal with.
• We both left work for the day to mourn the death of our beloved Ellie.
• We decide to let the vet perform an autopsy in the hopes of finding something on the cellular level that could be the cause of all of this. I’m not sure when we’ll hear back about it.
• We decided to bury Ellie at my parents’ house.

Surgery

Ellie Stats: 1 year and 5 months old

• 7:48 am ~ We took Ellie back to the vet this morning. No improvement over the night and she continued to have nausea and vomiting. I just hope they find whatever is making her sick when they cut her open, and she can start getting back to her usual plucky self! :(
• 9:51 am ~ The vet called and said Ellie's bloodwork work was good and that her kidneys have completely recovered since last week. They're going to move ahead with surgery, and the vet said he'd call to update us as soon as he "popped his gloves off".
• 11:18 am ~ So the vet just popped off his gloves and called Travis. He. Found. Nothing. Ellie has a healthy gut, and yet she's vomiting "digestive blood" - whatever that is. So he sewed her up and is going to keep her there for 7 days or so while she recovers and they try to get her stomach chemistry back to normal. He'll keep her hydrated and on pain meds as well. Freaking 18" incision for naught...
• Vet said she made it through surgery without missing a beat, though – strong and regular heart rate, good oxygen levels the whole time. That’s good at least.

Back at Home

Ellie Stats: 1 year and 5 months old

We brought Ellie home today at noon, but she's been nauseous ever since. I was hoping she would get her appetite back after she got home to a familiar setting, but no luck. We’re keeping our fingers crossed that it was just the movement of the ride home that has upset her stomach. I'm happy to have her home, but worried that we're headed right back to where we started. If she's no better in the morning, then back she goes to the vet....

Coming Home Soon

Ellie Stats: 1 year and 5 months old

• Ellie seemed even better today. Nothing turned up on the barium test so that's great. She still won't really eat though (other than a little kibble yesterday) so she's probably going to be there at least until Monday. I wish she would just get her appetite back so she could come home!
• Vet called and said that Ellie ate today and would've finished all of it if she hadn't found the pills that the vet tried to hide in there. lol I think she's coming home tomorrow! :D

Hopeful

Ellie Stats: 1 year and 5 months old

Yesterday's Ellie update was a bit scary, but God heard our prayers and today held better news. Ellie was in much better spirits today and started eating some food. She didn't really know what to think of the soft canned food, so she would kinda gum it then spit it out. Was kind of funny actually. When Travis visited this afternoon, he thought it'd be a good idea to give her something more familiar to eat and requested some kibble that she could try. She ate it. Go figure. Lol

Though she's still very weak, Ellie was able to walk around on her own today and was very happy to see all her visitors today. My dad went to visit her, and he said she tried to leave with him instead of following the vet. Sweet, but a little sad too. I know she's ready to come home and be away from all those other strange dogs that are back there in the other kennels.

Anyways, the vet was pleased with her progress and started her on a barium test earlier today. As of later this afternoon nothing was really showing up, so he said they would do another check on the progress of the test in the morning and a little more blood work. If they don't see anything, and if she will poop, then she's good to go! If they do see something with the test, then they'll go ahead with the surgery (but at least they'll kinda know where it is and it won't just be "exploratory").

The vet was much more hopeful today (though to temper expectations, he reminded us that nothing is for sure and that things could turn around at any time - especially if it's a blockage), and was pleased with her progress.

Keeping our fingers crossed!